Thoughts

I can't believe how small babies are at the one-year mark. I thought Drue was so big then. I was wrong. She is so big now. And of course, a few months from now I'll think she was so small at 21 months. She has hit a little growth spurt, though. I looked at a picture taken mid-February in which she was so very chubbalicious, and now she is suddenly looking so thin.

Since I don't have the energy to think of a topic on which to post, I will simply write what is going on in our lives in list form.

1. The nursery is gutted and ready for another life to (eventually: she'll sleep in our room for a while) inhabit it. It looks so cute!

2. I hope the baby comes early. I want to experience at least a little bit of labor and not just go in for my "baby appointment" March 29. I realized this tonight at dinner with friends. I kind of blurted out that I "loved labor," and Collin looked at me like I was crazy. But I did, in a difficult way to explain, love it, and I want to go into labor early so that I can experience at least a little bit of it again (and not have chosen my daughter's birthday...so weird). Actually, I'm realizing that I want to go into labor early because ultimately I want to be able to labor naturally again and not have a c-section at all. :(

3. The in-laws visited this weekend and helped out a lot around the house. We will see my parents this weekend. It is strange to think that this is our last round of visits without another child in the mix.

4. I am constantly back and forth with how I feel about the birth of our Paige Dallas. Most of this has to do with my concern for our Drue Alison, and how she will handle it. (That and my fear of lack of sleep and how I handle that.) I know that it will be good for Drue, good in general, great!, but part of me wants her to the be the center of the universe a little longer. And of course, by "the center of the universe" I do not mean "the center of the universe," for Christ is life, yes? But you know what I mean.

5. I am getting to know my across-the-street neighbors a little better, which I am thankful for. I would like to become friends with the youngest of the bunch, Stacy, who has a five-month-old baby girl, Rachel, and to invite her to do something sometime, but I don't know how yet. I imagine an outlet will come. For now we just talk when we pass outside, which is often. And Drue looooooves going to see baby Rachel, so that's fun.

6. Collin and work stuff. Hmm... Maybe I'll post about this later. Let me just say now that being on the job market for three years is difficult. I do not love academia; at least not today.