Lessons in What Not to Write: No. 526: "not unexpected"

I saw a tweet today that got me reeling. I am thankful it was just a tweet and not a book I'm editing. I like the person who wrote this tweet; he's a crafty guy, very good at what he does. But he could use a lesson in "writing worthiness".

Oh, twinges of hypocrisy are bubbling up. I know that very little that I write is exciting and/or worthy. Let me just say that up front. But the subject of this tweet went something like: traffic is really bad; it's not to be unexpected.

What does that sentence leave you feeling? It leaves me feeling like I just wasted time reading that sentence.

Lesson no. 1 in news writing: mans bites dog versus dog biting man. If the story isn't original, then don't write it. If your audience expects that the traffic will be bad, then they don't need to read that it was bad. And THEN be told that it is not to be unexpected. And let's not even get into the double negative issue here.

Today I published a Facebook status that admits to the world that I love to imagine myself playing lead guitar on songs that rock. I do this probably daily. Maybe a little less. Doesn't everyone do that? Anyway, that may be a stupid post; that may be something that no one wants to read; but at least it's not cheating the reader. It's giving them new news.

So, tell us something new, something truly unexpected. Make us feel. The purpose of even Twitter shouldn't be to ALONE write things like: went to the gym; went to the store; went to the gym again; played some golf; wow, it's hot; traffic is bad, but who the hell thought it wouldn't be? etc.

Or maybe that is it's purpose.

Hello!

Well, the first sentence of my last blog is incorrect. My identity isn't new; it has only been added to.

I love this baby more each day. It's quite a ride. I still don't mind getting up nights, mostly because I only have to do it once now, though we're having to sort of work toward the "once." Meaning, when she wakes up at 1:30, I have to go in and pat her and put in her pacifier, then go back to bed and wait to see if she'll cry and I need to do it again...until I actually feed her at 3:00. But I think she'll start sleeping until 3:00ish without assistance soon.

I was freaking out about her schedule last week but am feeling much better, thanks to the many friends who sent me messages on FB about the topic and the husband who is more understanding than I at times deserve. Right now we're doing a morning nap and a longer afternoon nap, and she's pretty much given up a full evening nap, though she likes to doze here and there before 7:00. A bedtime routine is forming. But most importantly, I'm learning to have an open hand with it all. There are days when the "schedule" just isn't going to work "perfectly," and that's okay. Thank God.

I made it through my first month back to work, which feels great. I look forward to one book in particular next month.

I Am a Mother

My identity has changed.

I've had some baby blues, but last night I had a breakthrough. I realized how bonded I'd become with the baby when I tried to feed her a bottle at 11 p.m. and wanted to cry. Let's be honest: did cry.

There's nothing wrong with bottles or formula. This is just my experience.

I also realized how much I love my baby when I went to Target to pick up some diapers and smelled them, and a huge smile crossed my face and I wanted to rush home to her.

I'm also starting to get used to being up nights. It's difficult but truly getting easier - something I hadn't thought about. I don't know why, but I honestly didn't think that this could get "normal." Thank God it does. Of course, I'm talking about one night here. We'll see if I'm spewing the same come tomorrow and the next day.

Collin has been great about bearing the load with me. We're lucky in that he doesn't have an eight-to-five, in-office job, and I have the month off, so now that I can drive, he makes sure I can get out a little. I was freaking out about him leaving during the day at first (mostly because I want to be selfish and NOT tied to my house and live the life I lived before, free as a bird), but a dear friend reminded me that who I am a wife and mother is probably much more sane than who I would be (and have been) without.

Anyway, here is our little Drue bear.


I sang "Jesus, Lover of My Soul" to her the other day while she was settling down, and I realized how much she depends on us, as we are to depend on Jesus. What a beautiful picture painted before me. Unfortunately, I forget it all too often and think I'm doing this all alone. Thank God I'm not. And thank God she's not.

"Other refuge have I none
I helpless hang on thee
Leave, oh, leave me not alone
Support and comfort me
All my trust on thee is stayed
All help from thee I bring
Cover my defensless head
In the shadow of thy wing."

Let's be honest: I had trouble not boo-hooing through this verse.

In a change of subject...
I never thought I'd have to have a c-section, especially for such a tiny thing. I took the tape off my incision today. Strange to think that's where she finally came from - after a labor to remember. I'd go back and do it again in a heartbeat.

Still getting used to this mother thing though.

"They float down here. And when you're down here, you'll float too!"

I finished Jodi Picoult's The Pact this morning. I don't know what I think about the ending. The whole book was depressing. Parents who don't know their kids; kids who don't know who they are. It was well written and compelling, as usual; she's one of those who can break rules and it's OK. But the ending. Was it too quick? I like that she ended with the climax and wrapped up in an epilogue, but I felt there was one bit of information lacking.

I don't want to ruin this book for anyone, so that's all I'll say, but if you've read The Pact, did you think there was at least one bit of information lacking in the epilogue, or did you love how it was done?

My husband is finally conquering his fear of Stephen King's It. He's been afraid of the story, or the Pennywise the clown, since the movie came out on TV in 1990. He's on page 753 of the book now and loving it, which is validating to me, as it's one of my favorite books.

I would love it if he started reading fiction regularly. He's already a great idea man and has been helping me with my novel a bit (although sometimes I have to tell him to save it; the plot is the plot, and these other fantastic ideas can go into other stories), and I think his reading fiction will make for some fun conversation. Not as though we don't already have great conversation, but how cool would it be to talk about psychology, research, AND story, among other things, of course.

4:54 p.m. + 7 working days

Just finished an incredibly sad and moving story about an American nurse working in Saudi Arabia. Remind me to tell you about it.

In other news: just finished the backmatter for an incredibly sad and moving story about an American nurse working in Saudi Arabia. Remind me to tell you how to get a copy of the book once it releases.

And finally: the book does has some non-sadness about it.

Awry in Arabia by Mary D. Kavanwal

Psycho Editor is Unable to See Beyond Technicalities, Becomes Depressed

I've noticed that I often get so caught up in structure that I forget character - that, to me, structure trumps character. But this seems crazy. Could this be true?

When I've asked job candidates the question, "What makes or breaks a (fiction) book for you?" nine times out of ten the candidate's answer has been "character." And nine times out of ten I have snickered and thought, How cliche. Do you really know what you mean by that?

But the truth is: character is a fine answer. Often times whether I've liked or cared about a character was the reason I kept reading a book and didn't throw it across the room. So why do I have such trouble digging into this area when I'm editing a book? Why is it always: plot structure, holes, story questions, plates, stimulus-response, dialogue tags, etc.?

Probably because these are the things I studied in grad school. But also because these are simply the things that stick out to me.

Last month, however, I felt I did at least one of my authors a disservice by not talking character and focusing on other, what I thought were, larger issues. And maybe they were larger issues, but regardless of whether this author goes back and fixes all of her dialogue and answers or doesn't answer certain story questions, there is still the issue of, Do I really know and love these characters? What could she do to make me care about them more?

It's not as I don't have pages and pages of knowledge on this stored away as well. I just seldom bring it up. Ugh.

This month: I focus on character. I see what happens. I dig deeper. I don't forget about the rules, but I am honest about how I feel about the characters in the books I'm editing and whether they really impact the reader.

This month: I get back to work on my novel.

This month: I have a baby.

This month: Angela and I make this magazine happen.

And then I don't sleep for a while, because hey, it's May. I can't believe it's already May. I had a big realization when I left work Thursday that today it would be May. And months go fast. And at the end of this month comes new life. Whoa.

A Follow Up

BACK TO HUMOROUS CREATIVE NON-FICTION:

A writer friend asked what I ended up sharing with the author whose memoir I edited and posted on earlier this month.

Had I given the book more time before posting I would have seen that there were moments of depth in the story and ultimatley a well-contructed story with a clear story arc. I spent most of my notes discussing story structure, tense, and the inclusion of a second voice. However, there was also something to be said about the at-times too intense humor toward the beginning of the book.

So I addressed where the author was pushing it; where hyperbole was too obvious; where humor could have worked better if focused differently (e.g.,not just on sex; that gets boring, is too easy, and can exude an image the author doesn't want to portray). That's not to say I don't appreciate both brokenness and redemption. I do. I read mainstream women's fiction and get a kick out of the crass humor at times. But there's no denying it can be a little...bleh. Have you SEEN SNL lately?

It was a good read, and I'm excited to look over the polished product next month.

An Awakening of the Mind

A fellow editor and I were walking back to our computers after a nice walk to Homeland, and she asked, "Bruce Springsteen or Huey Lewis?" I had to go with Huey Lewis. I don't know much Springsteen but grew up with The News. Then she said, "Huey Lewis or Billy Joel?" I had to go with Billy Joel. Then somehow Phil Collins came up, and she said, "He beats 'em all!"

I realized that growing up I thought that every Phil Collins song I heard on the radio was just a Phil Collins song. I knew of a band called Gensis, didn't I? But weren't they just a side project for Phil Collins for some short period of time?

Well, no. Duh.

I then realized that I now knew that Genesis was something bigger than I'd always suspected, but that I'd still never learned much about the band. So, I finally took to Wikipedia tonight and learned about Genesis, and whoa...what a project. I had no idea. Basically every Phil Collins song I ever loved growing up (aside from "In the Air Tonight" and "Sussudio" and the song about the homeless lady) was indeed a product of Genesis. Even less did I know that Peter Gabriel (holy cow) was the original singer of this band.

I am now up to speed on Genesis, at age 30.

"If you didn't do some crying while writing this book, then the book's not done."

QUESTION: Can a person write his or her autobiography or memoir (there is a distinct difference) without crying at some point?

I'm editing a memoir right now that is very well done. There are some issues to be addressed, sure. But they're all very common and easy fixes (so far), except for one...

The author is good at humor. This is a skill. This is great. I read the Table of Contents and laughed. That was good.

Yes, there are moments that the humor can be cut, when it is forced or the hyperbole is too obvious. No problem. But this is a story about brokenness and disfunction. It is the story of a mother, daughter, and daughter's daughter trio. There are some really sad truths behind the humor, and sometimes I want to cry instead of laugh, but I can't, because the author won't let me. She forces me to laugh.

Is this good? Is it okay? Will readers feel cheated, or am I just an emotional basketcase who enjoys crying too much?

I've written some of my own story, and there was a lot of crying involved in that endeavor. Perhaps I didn't see enough humor in it as I was writing; there's definitely humor there; but that wasn't the purpose of the exercise, so maybe what I'm really doing here is asking this author to do what I did. Maybe I'm being too subjective.

In conclusion, because I'm clearly failing to pull my thoughts together: I'm going to think through these things and find a cohesive way to express them to the author. Currently my note reads: "Your reader wants to feel like you’re telling the truth more often. If you didn’t do some crying while writing this book, then the book’s not done. Some of the harsh reality needs to come through; I think a person who picks up this book doesn’t want just a humor book. And a book that makes you laugh AND cry will make you all the more marketable."

Still thinking...

(Also, in case you were wondering, that's only a snippet of my thoughts-note.)

A Trip Down Memory Lane

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8myK93FqbYc

My grandmother loved the Mills Brothers. We used to listen to their tapes in her car, and so I loved them too.

I was in an after-school program for a short time in the fifth grade, and the lady who ran the program created an Olympics event that included who could jump rope the longest, etc. One of the competitions was a dance competition. The rules were: you choreograph the dance (the first time I'd heard the word choreograph) and you choose the song. Only the song couldn't be longer than two minutes.

The movie Dirty Dancing had just come on the scene, and "I've Had the Time of My Life" had hit the radio waves big time. There were I think three of us who entered the dance competition: myself, Julie H., and Amanda R. The OBVIOUS choice was to go with "I've Had the Time of My Life," but I wanted to be original. I went with the Mills Brothers' "Opus One." Oh yeah.

So, the big day comes, and Amanda and Julie go up to do their self-choreographed dances, but the opener to the song "I've Had the Time of My Life," you'll remember, is rather long and BORING. Let's have a refresher, shall we?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RH0lEVMuzzw

You'll notice that by the time the ticker hits two minutes, we're barely into the dance-worthy part of the song. (Please note I'm being sarcastic. I realize one can dance to the beginning portion of that song with much feeling and grace. However, I remember one of my competitors spent almost a full minute lying on the ground before rising in an "I've just woken up" sort of way, etc. We were in the fifth grade!)

Cut to: Meghan runs out to her starting position and busts a dance to "Opus One," a two-minute (almost exactly) song that nobody expects!

Looking back, I'm sure that all of the kids my age were laughing at me and making fun of me behind my back. "What a GEEK!" But the lady who ran the program: she loved it. I took home the cardboard gold medal. And I think I won the silver in jump roping.

All this to say, thanks Kylie for randomly getting "Glow Worm" stuck in your head today and boldly sharing with two bewildered co-workers. This has been a fun trip down memory lane.

"I can't kill anything that tickles me, Hank."

Just before I got married I started watching King of the Hill on DVD. I'd watched it on Fox when I had basic cable and lived alone. When I moved in with my friends, I no longer had cable but needed to get my KOTH fix, so I started buying it. I started with season three then got seasons six and five as gifts. After we were married, I went through a phase of watching KOTH pretty much constantly (still no cable). One day my husband had had enough. He turned off the show that was playing while I washed dishes, put it in its case, and took every case of KOTH sitting around the living room and put it away.

Maybe it was just the fact that the discs were no longer readily available. Maybe I was actually tired of them and didn't realize it until he put them away. Maybe I was just taking the hint and giving him a break. But I stopped watching King of the Hill that day and haven't regularly pulled it out of its hiding place since.

Today I did. And I love it.

Feet

I'm having to get up from my desk more frequently now. My feet feel burny and swollen.

P.S. I just left this up on my desktop and was going to go for a short walk around the facility when I ran into some acquisitions reps, one of whom, after a short conversation about having to get up and walk around quite a bit (prompted by the question: how are you feeling?) loaned me her footstool! I'm using it now. It is wonderful (sigh of relief).

Drue Alison Barnes

We had a third ultrasound today. The doc wanted to check her kidneys. Turns out everything has matured well, and things look great. And we got this great profile picture out of it!

Found a crib and dresser/changing table. Ecstatic. This is starting to feel very real.

Iiiiiiiit's FRIDAY!

Listening to: Silence.

Accomplished today:

Team meeting. Fielded general questions, mostly involving what to do when a book has gone to layout and the author sends new info, like endorsements. Everyone has a book he/she is really excited about this month. I must admit, I'm a bit jealous that Angela picked up the Solomon's wife story, but I've got two fine books to tackle, so I'm good. Very good.

Edited. Worked on a fantasy story today. Mostly honing in on dialogue tags, as the story is very well put together. Possible problem in sleeping patterns. The author might be married to the day-by-day approach, but I've just started so we'll see.

Book club. Working through and discussing Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. We read a couple of really dark chapters this week. Trying to figure out August's motivation and whether I really think the protagonist is male. (I know he is; I just can't get over the fact that it took me quite a few pages to realize he was.)

Grammar meeting. Learned something new about implied subjects and when a comma is necessary in a sentence such as, "Now, go ahead and open the book, and turn to page four." Because the subject, you, is implied for both clauses but is nowhere to be found in the sentence, the comma separating the two is acceptable, correct even. Except in this case I'd argue it is not necessary because the second clause is so short. If the sentence were to read, "Now, let's go ahead and open the book and turn to page four," no comma is necessary because the subject, us, is there, and both verbs refer back to it. But enough about that.

Magazine brainstorm. Indeed this magazine idea is starting to come to life. We're this close to settling on a name, which will help focus our communication and really let us figure out where we're going with the mag. I like the team we've put together and can't wait to see what kind of logos KP comes up with once we settle on a name. Being able to visualize it a bit better will work wonders.

Editing. Well, blogging. As soon as I hit Post, editing. Then home. Then Red Lobster. I haven't been there in years. All I remember is waiting for a table for a REALLY long time. Let's hope that isn't the case tonight.

On a personal note: Husband is sick. Baby is kicking. Stomach is rumblig. Feet are swollen. I can't wait to see dear friends tomorrow and Sunday. How I love the weekend.

Grace and Peace.

Green March

Starting a new batch of books and loving every minute of it. I have a younger author this month. He's publishing his first with us, and I'm thrilled to have been assigned the book. I think we'll make a good team. He seems to have a solid understanding of what an editor and writer do, how they relate and work together. I've already got some good feedback for him and can't wait to see how this book grows. Not a bad start to a new month.

In other news: baby is growing. She now has a middle name: Alison. I'm scared to death one minute and ecstatic the next. I can't wait to gut my house in preparation and am counting down the minutes to the allotted time to do so.

I never believed "nesting" was real. It is.

Quickly!

REPORT: Started writing up a handout on viewpoint today. Did not come close to finishing.

I have a lot to accomplish in the next two weeks.

WRITE UP TWO BACKMATTERS
FINISH NOTES ON 1 MS
FINISH VP HANDOUT AND SEND TO TEAM
FINISH TIM CALLAHAN'S DARK DAYS IN MORGAN COUNTY
WRITE RADIO SHOW (BREAKTHROUGH) X2
REVIEW TEAM'S BACKMATTER AND CAFs
OTHER STUFF

We're going to Dallas tomorrow. Should be interesting.

Notes

ACCOMPLISHED TODAY: research; almost finished editing "take charge of your kitchen and still have a life" cook book, love it; reviewed children's backmatter; no meetings, if you can believe it.

We have a team meeting next Friday to discuss point of view. As I mentioned, it's been on my mind. I pulled out pages of old notes on the subject today. Can't wait to go back over them. I was searching through my notes because I was looking for notes on subplot and resolution. Here are a few of the ideas that came to mind:

dominant impression - every major character needs one, lest they all look/sound/feel the same

plates - these are small questions you toss up throughout the story to keep the reader engaged/worried/questioning; the key is that they all must be answered; it's the classic "gun on the mantel" issue - if there's a gun on the mantel, it's got to be used at some point; all plates should be resolved before the story climax.

subplots - these are fantastic; just make sure the reader doesn't become confused as to which is the main plotline; the first subplot usually has to do with the protagonist's inner struggle; there's usually another that the antagonist is "in charge" of; subplots should also be resolved before the story climax.

more on general story resolution and open-ended questions later...

attitude is everything

need to: write thank you notes; pray more for loved ones, colleagues, and authors; read for book club; think more before responding; not concern myself so much with what was said after responding; stop eating so much sugar; register for baby stuff

thankful for: community, honesty, and openness; girlfriends; maternity clothes; my kittehs; a husband who loves me; this life in my belly

thinking about: point of view, seinfeld, how fat i'm getting, work, the future

do not like: our futon

Childhood Memories Make Meggo and Crazy Girl

In 1987 I was in the third grade. I was new to Union Public Schools and attended Darnaby Elementary. I was an instant nerd, looked down upon because I didn't own Guess jeans with zippers near the ankle. I hated the third grade.

That year there was a talent show for all grades.

Mrs. Duckworth's class (that was my class) walked single file and silently into the gymnasium and sat in one long row on the white floor. I remember we were sitting just to the right of center stage and quite a few rows back. I had no idea what was going on. I don't even know if I realized we were about to witness a talent show (which I would participate in two years later as a fifth grader, lip synching to "I'm Gonna Buy Me a Dog" by the Monkeys, and again as a sixth grader, when I sang along to a tape of Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings"). I was probably too preoccupied worrying about how all the girls in my class hated me and how in the world was I going to get them to like me?

I don't remember any of the acts but one. Two sixth grade boys - one on guitar, the other I can't remember - played and sang Yes's "Owner of a Lonely Heart."

Whatever I had previously been preoccupied with disappeared when these two started playing. I was captivated. I'd never seen live music like this. I'd heard my dad and his brothers sing barbershop quartet. I'd heard lots of live singing, sure. But I'd not seen an electric guitar in action. I'd not realized that people performed in this way. I'm afraid I didn't even know what rock music was. I knew the Beach Boys. Well, I guess since I knew the song I knew a little something about music, but I must have just heard it on my mother's radio station one day, because what my parents really listened to the Beach Boys, the Beatles, and Kenny Rogers.

Anyway, these kids, according to my memory, were amazing. They were not lip synching. They were performing "Owner of a Lonely Heart," and they were awesome...and flawless. Again, this according to my memory. But they were.

Years later I would think about that performance and wonder, Were they really singing live? I was always still pretty certain they were, but it stuck with me. The song stuck with me. Everytime I've heard it over the years, I've thought of that talent show.

Well, recently - over Christmas - I decided I might try to find out if my memory was correct. Collin and I were home for the holidays, and I pulled out my old 1987 Darnaby Rangers yearbook (the one with the Guess symbol on the cover) and looked up the sixth grade class. I knew I would recognize at least one of the boys who sang "Owner of a Lonely Heart" because I remembered he had a specific look about him.

I found him. His name was...well, maybe I shouldn't say...but I found him. Collin was there. He looked at me like I was a little crazy and said..., "Oh." (But he has to admit that he was at least a little curious too. I mean, sixth graders rocking live? Come on.) After Christmas we came back to Norman, and some days later I looked this guy up on Facebook.

No go.

At this point I realize you probably think I'm a stalker or just nuts, but you know what? I don't really care.

So, I didn't find him, and I let it go.

Then today... I thought about the song again. I don't even remember why, but I thought it couldn't hurt to try again. So, I looked him up, and someone's picture came up that fit the description.

Dare I write this guy?

Me being me, I did, really without much thought.

Well, long story short, it was him. He had played in the 1987 talent show, and he and his friend had NOT been lip synching but had played live the previously mentioned song by Yes.

I was thrilled. He was flattered. My husband is glad I have peace. End of story.

Speaking of the Beach Boys, I was talking to my mother today about nursery colors. I told her I've been thinking purples and browns and maybe some green. She asked what shades and asked whether I have a theme in mind. I told her I don't like the brightest or darkest shades of any of those colors, so I'm thinking soft, and I have no idea about a theme. I asked her, "Do you think I should do some sort of storybook theme?" She responded, "Well, you know I'm not all cutesy [nor am I, thought daughter], so I don't know. What about the Muppets? You always loved them. You could brainwash her with the Muppets like your dad did you the Beach Boys."

I laughed. "Perfect," I wrote. "How about a Muppet mural so that every time she wakes up at night and sees the wall, she is terrified?"

Mom wrote back, "So, how about these colors: Fozzy Bear brown, Kermie green, and Miss Piggy purple."

Perfect.

Axe That Prologue!

Was at dinner Sunday, and a woman across the table had just read Twin Motives, a book I edited. She loved it. I was thrilled.

My team of editors had a quick discussion last Friday about a 2,000-word piece one of my colleagues had sent around. It was the first 2,000 words of one of her mss.

What a great discussion. From 2,000 words came the topics:

When a prologue and/or epilogue is unnecessary
Viewpoint
Showing v. telling
Religiosity – when is a book over the top; how do you approach it; one way is to address character flaws as well as realistic dialogue
When a character is too perfect – what makes a good hero
Dialogue
Narrative breaks

Not only were these great topics to discuss, but I was able to see how each of my team members would have tackled the book. I was the only one who said the prologue gets the axe. And I was right.

I see more of these meetings in our team's future.

the day of the purple dress

STATUS REPORT: Tired after a long day. Looking forward to moving offices Thursday. Need to do some cleanups tomorrow lest I fall too far behind on my to-do list. Losing the light at the end of this month's tunnel but know it's there. It always is.

Worked on a long MS today. It's good. I jibe with what the authors are saying. (This is nonfiction.) However, the book is 116,000 words long and needs some serious cutting. It's not been too difficult thus far. However, I feel brain cells dying daily. This baby is making me stupid. I had a lot of trouble focusing today on what, on a normal, non-pregnant day, would have been easy thinking and reading. I would have left work rejuvinated and ready to get home to one of my side reading ventures. I love to read. Instead I left work mentally exhausted. Hopefully it was but one bad day.

Bad day nothwithstanding, I still rocked that MS.

There are few things more fulfilling than making great edits on a book and knowing the author is going to put forth the effort to take his or her book to the next level. Good writers work with their editors, trust their editors. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I am saying that you should have a dialogue with me, and just as much as I should listen to you and care about your vision for your book, you should hear my vision and care about what I have to say. After all, I have your book's best interest in mind. We should work together to meet the objective of putting the best book we can on the market. That is what partnership publishing is all about, folks.

I love my job.

The Cliffhanger

MORNING REPORT: Team meeting to discuss issues, questions, and exciting new ideas. Went well. Topics discussed included: title length, passive voice, how soon should dialogue show up in a novel, and cliffhangers.

One of my editors asked me today, "Do you have a particular book you could show me that does a really good job of switching scenes?"

Me: ???

Then she said, "All of my authors tend to do things like write, 'And back to such-and-such,' or 'Back in Detroit...' to denote setting or scene change."

I cringed.

"That is sad," I said.

We then got into a conversation about cliffhangers, hooks, and stopping in the middle of action at the end of a chapter. This seems obvious to me, but I guess I do run across a lack of it in books at times. Fortunately, I've not had to deal with the "Back at Sarah's house, Joni was cooking dinner when..." issue.

So, how does a writer keep the reader clear when they're switching settings a lot? Well, first, is the story structured well? But then come to mind things like: they've got good characters that the reader doesn't have trouble remembering. They have good conflict. They employ the use of narrative and chapter breaks. They end their chapters with HOOKS!

I don't know how many times I've written to an author "No hook" at the end of a chapter. I've probably written this before here, but if your character is going to bed at the end of chapter two, so is your reader. What you really want is for your reader to NEED to turn that page and read chapters three and four, etc. If you stop a chapter in the middle of a question or great action and then switch to a different setting, the reader shouldn't have as much trouble finding their way back when you come back to said conflict question later.

There's obviously more to this, but these are the first few things that come to mind.

Now to editing...

Look at that foot!

Wow. What a moment. The ultrasound technician, who surely has a more professional title that I don't know, points at the screen and says, "Have any guesses?"

I knew right away. It was a girl.

"Yes. It's a girl."

Collin, from over my shoulder, practically shouts, "No way!" And tears of joy or something are running down my cheeks. I can't believe it. I'm going to be a mommy. I'm going to have a little girl.

Collin is going to be such a fantastic father, and she is going to love him so much. Her name is Drue (middle name pending). Drue Barnes. And she's a cutie pie.

The Cranberry Hook

My goal today: hit goal and don't get frustrated. Don't wear my emotions on my sleeve. This is difficult when hormones are raging. I've felt a failure the past two days, but I feel more on my game today. I am referring to staff squabbles about which I can't go into detail here.

What is today's goal? To finish this adventure book, set up a couple of interviews, and either review backmatter for the books I've finished or complete another quality control review. Word total: 28,000ish.

I'm wearing my first maternity pants today. One of the women in our church kindly graced me with a tub of clothing. She's a bit smaller than me (the pants I'm wearing today probably fit her at six months and just barely fit me at twelve weeks), shorter, but I think the clothes are going to work! And they're cute. What a money-saver and a blessing.

I made a huge cranberry salad last night with the help of my darling husband. If you enjoy cranberry salad, ask me for this recipe; it is outstanding. We're having Thanksgiving at work today. The design department, illustrators, and we editors are all getting together for food and activities at lunch. Should be keen. I hope there is some leftover cranberry salad to take home (for Collin's sake...and mine). You never know. It's always either a total hit, or the group of people you try to feed it to hate cranberries/new things. I'm telling you, this is the best cranberry recipe on the planet, and it's so simple!

And it smells good when you're making it.

Back to work. Remember: if you're working on a novel, no matter the genre, work to hook your reader at the end of each chapter. If you end the chapter with the doctor coming in the room and saying, "Oh, it looks like everything is going to be fine!" your reader will put the book down frustrated and might not pick it up again. Leave the character bleeding in the hospital bed!

Tylenol Woes

I feel like I should change the name of my blog since I haven't blogged about writing in a while. I would if I had the energy (and the whining begins). You can read at least one of my October writing blogs at: http://tatepublishingeditors.blogspot.com/

I'm lying on my couch with a pouding headache, listening to football fans shout "Boomer! Sooner!" from my not-open window (it would be so much more romantic somehow if the window were open). I hate game day traffic, but I have to admit I enjoy living this close to the stadium. I enjoy the stadium sounds. I enjoy the crowds, even though I scoff at them during the day in my scary judgmental way.

I wanted to go to the Dixons' tonight, but my headache and level of sleepy kept me from it. I am sick of being sick. I do see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it is dim. I actually threw up this week. It was the first time in over ten years that I threw up without helping myself. I don't mean to say that I've suffered bulimia. Thank God I haven't. But I have felt bad enough before that I thought physically getting sick would help, so I stuck a spoon down my throat (tmi?). This time: no spoon necessary. I was just drying my hair Tuesday morning and suddenly, oh, I'm going to toss that milk I just drank.

Since I'm having more bearable days to go along with my bad days though, I have been able to eat a better assortment of foods. For a while there it was Taco Bell grilled stuffed burritos every day. Now I can't even think about fast food without gagging. I like this particular change. What I don't like is never cooking and being so picky every day. I also can't wait to find water refreshing again.

Enough feeling sorry for myself.

I'm so excited to be back with the band. :) I started singing in church again last week and made it to practice again today. I love those guys, and I hate feeling out of the music loop. Now if only the trumpet (which is a marvelous instrument, and Wes is a genius playing it; I'm just not myself right now) would stop making me want to vomit. Soon enough!

I leave you with Halloween pics:


Collin's first jack-o-lantern. (Note the fuzzy orange precious on the left.)


You can tell who the artist is. (Hint: not me.)


My work crew. Seventeen Depps for Seventeen Editors.

P.S. I only have three books to read this month. Should make for some great edits, and I can't wait to delve in. Still, it's a short month (can't believe the holidays are here), so I'm going to have to buckle down more than usual. I'm unable to keep up with this blog the way I'd like, but (if you care) know that it's because work keeps me offline.

Crackers have become a large part of my life.

I am pregnant. I have the four tests to prove it. (Not really. They're long gone.) Why did I take four tests? Well, I've never been pregnant before, so when the second line showed, but only just barely, we weren't sure. Now, I was pretty sure. I thought, there's no way a line would show if it didn't detect this crazy hormone in my body. But hubs wasn't so sure. I don't blame him. The line was really light. Oh, and I'll never forget Collin's sound when I walked into the bathroom, looked at the test, looked at him, and paused. It was a nervous sort of chuckle-choke. And he smiled.

When I took the test the following morning, the second line was still light--but darker. Yes, darker. Still, C wasn't sure. I did some reading up online that day, and I was sure. But I just had to have his agreement. Just had to. So when he went off to work that day, I went to the store, grabbed some pre-natal vitamins and another test--this one the one that reads "preganant," "not pregnant." He was up at the lab and needed a broom, so I brought him one, along with a little stick that read "pregant." He was speechless.

Why the fourth test, you wonder, if you remember my mention of it? Well, I'm just paranoid, that's all. I took another five days later because I was feeling really cra(m)ppy and not feeling sick, like I was just sure I would feel, so blah blah blah. I'm paranoid. But I'm also pregnant.

I don't know how much I should post about this--this being my editing blog and all, but I thought I'd writing something. We'll see where it goes from there. We did talk names last night. I much have spent two and a half hours in a book of names only looking at "Boys' Names" and come up with next to nothing. Girls were a different story. We've got some "working titles." We're getting there with boys. I keep gravitating to B names though, which you'd think wouldn't work since our last name is a B name, but I love me some alliteration, and if you do it well, it can be strong.

I'm not naming my child B**** just because it's alliteration, for any sickos who really think I would.

Oh, now I really want to post about names, but I fear I would only be copying my friend Courtney, who is due oddly on the same day as (insert correct pronoun here. One thing I will say is, I think I'd like to narrow it down to two per sex. That way when the baby is born, Collin can behold him or her and decide his or her name. (Let's say it's a her.) "Ah," he will say, "she is clearly Blythe." He's good at naming that way. He saw the one pound seven ounce cat I brought home and almost immediately said, "We shall call her...Marigold." And she's lived up to her name ever since.

If marigolds are a really fat flower.

Onto editing. Tomorrow marks the end of another month. I tend to blog at the end of the month. I've decided I will not stress next month no matter how much my job begs me to. Now matter how much this computer begs me to worship it, I won't. I'm thinking dialogue. It's written on my hand--the word "dialogue." I think I'm going to whip up a sheet on this most difficult concept and start a dialogue about dialogue with my department. I promise I will post it here, for those who need their word fix. Until then, thank God for Jesus, without whom I would crumble to pieces.

Chronologicalication

I'm working on a book right now that is supposed to be a chronological study of a particular book of the Bible. Vagary!

Although the author attempts to create a chronological study, it (yes, I refuse to submit the sex of this questionable writer) fails at every turn.

The whole issue begs the question: do I have the wrong draft? Did this draft get entirely flubbed/flipped/flopped around in transmission? Perhaps this person has a computer program I've ne'er heard of.

Because it is utterly impossible that this person meant to repeat itself (there it is again) so many times, nor is is possible that this person does not see how the book is not chronological but illogical.

Unfortunatley, it is possible, because this IS the correct draft. I spoke with the author yesterday. We have work to do! But it shall be done!

"She's got some thing with her mother. It's tough."

We've recently started watching Seinfeld again. (The joys of Netflix.) I realize the show is on television every day, but seeing as we don't have any sort of basic cable in our home, I've not been inundated with reruns of Seinfeld and Scrubs and Wings (yes, Wings) and Golden Girls and whatever else is constantly on the tube these days for years. This classic, hilarious, timeless show is just as good as new to me again, and I love it.

Speaking of weird. We're still finishing up Twin Peaks.


YES!

Our dear friend Kyle says there is a subplot coming that we're going to hate. I'm on the hunt for this alleged subplot but have yet to encounter it. Bring it on, David Lynch!

As for work, we've met the end of another month, and my Friday deadline looms. I've finished all first edits and am thrilled about two books this month. One a contemporary mystery, the other a textbook about God and country. Wish I could write more, but I need to finish this episode of Seinfeld and get back to work. Perhaps one day I'll be caught up.

Oh! But first, quickly, the Olympics! The one sport I cared about more than any other: the marathon. I have to say I was heartbroken when our guys came in ninth and tenth, though that was a first for USA, which is fantastic. I really wanted Hall to place. Really. But he's only 25, so there's always 2012 (and even 2016). Strange to think that far in the future.



Think I'll go for a run. Forget television!

And as for a word of writing advice: stop capitalizing everything. Writers like to capitalize things that don't need to be capitalized. Are you one of them? My advice is: get comfortable with Chicago Manual of Style's capitalization laws. That's right, I said laws. Get comfortable wih any style guide's capitalization rules, because they are all going to tell you similarly to stop capitalizing everything. It's distracting, just like italics. And who wants to distract their reader? Not me said the editor.

Nuptials

Another month down, another to go. I just organized my email files. I have so many of them now. A lot of people hate Outlook. Perhaps I'm just uneducated, ignorant, not cool, but I like it! I have folders within folders and folders and more folders, adn they're all right there for me to easily behold and navigate.

I'm sure there is many an email program that allows one to do the same things, but I don't care. I like Outlook.

Until it crashes. What does it mean when a window pops up and says, "Would you like to auto archive your files?" Where do those files go?

Do you know, I don't really care.

I finished sending out all edits and clean ups today, and it felt great. I approved three proofs, which also felt great, and now I'm down to sending out final scores for the month and nitpicking with a handful of MSS that need to be ready for layout by the end of the working day tomorrow. I think I can get this done; however, I've got meetings upon meetings tomorrow. Four meetings? I think so, yes, four meetings.

I'm looking forward to next month, I think. We'll see how a full month with a regular workload goes. I'm hoping it will go well.

I'm "friends" with the new RUF intern on Facebook now. I can't wait to meet her!

What else, what else...

I am going to be 30 a week from TODAY. That is a strange pill to swallow.

Last night I went through a bunch of old grad school notes. Note about pieces I was writing; notes from class; actual old MSS; handouts. It was a lot of fun. I think I'll use a lot of this old work to craft conceptual notes for the editors on my team. I might also post them here. We shall see.

Not much else about the pub world today. I'm too happy to have a bit of a day of rest tomorrow. And then comes the new load Friday.

I also came across a bunch of old songs I used to play. Many of them I had written, and I didn't even remember them. I had a lot of songs in the early 2000s. I did a lot of writing. In fact, I found a bunch of "song doodles" in the class folders I was going through last night. I might have to rework some of those lyrics to new music (since I don't remember the old music). Might be fun. C and I have been talking about "jamming" lately. Although we always end up sitting around, working in our free time, not doing fun stuff like jamming.

Sorry so scattered. More quality blogging to follow.

No to Nuptuals!

Weddings are a beautiful thing. They are a picture of Christ and the church, a great mystery. Lovely. Exciting. I cry at every wedding I attend, without fail.

We went to a beautiful wedding last weekend in fact. Kim was a beautiful, blushing bride, and I mean beautiful. Wow. It was so much fun spending time with friends I hadn't seen in a while, and I can't tell you how excited I am that one of those friends is moving back to Oklahoma.

So, weddings are great.

Not so in print.

If you are considering writing nuptuals into your novel, think long and hard before you implement them. How much of the grand event do I absolutely HAVE to include? How many details MUST be in the story? Who is my audience? What percentage of my readership will I alienate with an extravagent wedding scene? These are good questions.

Further, in evaluating the necessity of the nuptual, ask whether this is just you taking the opportunity to be "descriptive." If it is, be assured you can employ brilliant description elsewhere (or less description here). A wedding slows the pace of the story exponentially...ultimately because conflict is key. Unless there is a shooting in the middle of the wedding; unless there is something that hinders the hero, some conflict arises there, it probably doesn't need to be there. The story MUST move forward!

Reading at Home on a Friday Night

Yes, when my husband and I feel like we're not being social enough for a Friday night, we just remember: we do things with friends on Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays. Fridays and Saturdays are for us, for relaxing. Well, Sundays are for the real relaxing. Saturdays are for working, and tonight, Friday nights are for working. Why? This is how my day played out:

8 a.m. - Got to work an hour early. Set up shop at my desk, which involves turning on my computer then going to the cafe for coffee, coming back (checking the thermostat on the way) and hoping my computer has booted.

8-9 a.m. - Caught up on email with a couple of authors, made notes in their files, opened Pandora.com, put in my ear buds, sent out two staff emails, and got started reading. Goal for the day: at least 21,000 words.

9-10 - Got a new cup of coffee, ate a nectarine at my desk, and kept reading.

10 - Meeting with team member.

10:30-11:20 - Read like a maniac, make lots of comments, try to view minimal email.

11:20 - 3:20! - Batman: The Dark Knight (That's right: field trip...for artsy purposes.)

3:20 - 4:00 - View minimal email, answer teammate's questions about issues he's having with a couple of authors, read?

4 - 5 p.m. - Meetings!

Did I meet my reading objective? A resounding no. Will I meet it tonight? Perhaps.

The man that v. The man who

I got caught up a bit more at work today. Good thing.

I've been thinking about common mistakes writers make and thought I'd address a few of those. (For those of you who read Pub Rants, yes, I'm unabashadly copying her, but this is genuinely what's on my mind.)

1) Stick to the story question(s). If you want to go of on a rant, fight the urge if that rant does not further the story. Description for description's sake does not work. It is boring, and you will lose your reader, as well as the interest of your editor. I want conflict, and I want it now, and I want to feel like I'm moving toward resolution.

2) Do not include the first description that comes to mind unless it is brilliant. Chances are, your best descriptions will take time. I've sat in front of my computer for five minutes trying to think of a way to describe a character's nose (and whether it was even worth describing). I ended up going with strawberry seeds. Stop being cliche. There are many great resources out there that discuss description, where it belongs and doesn't, etc. I'll stop there.

3) Learn the basics and copy edit your material. Don't send an agent or an editor anything less than your best work. If you're not good at syntax, have a friend who is read over your MS before you send it out (lest your work be thrown away). I'm in a different boat, as those MSS that come across my desk are contracted. But when I see five errors on page one, I cringe. Do I really have to trudge through this?

--As a side note, this may sound harsh, but I assure you: New York is harsher. And I am not even close to New York.

4) Work with your editor. When I make comments, heed them...and probably employ them. Your editor knows her stuff. She is not perfect, but she has been studying the craft since she was eighteen. She knows story and has good ideas for you. She also cares about your work.

So Busy and Still Slacking

I got back from camp with the kids Sunday around midnight. I only now feel back to normal, yet I'm still tired. So is life. I have so much catching up to do at work that I'm having trouble seeing straight, yet I can't make myself dig into the book I should reading right now. It is about Richard III. It's an interesting premise...a woman looking for the "real" history of Richard III and being basically hunted down by a group of Druids. Present day. New York. New York City Public Library, which always and forever will make me think of the original Ghostbusters. I need to start writing more on this thing. Resolution: blog more. Easier said than done.

Camp was amazing. I only wish hubs had been able to go. The ocean, on a clear day, was absolutely beautiful. So much so that I couldn't drag myself out of the water. The sand was like sugar, and the sun felt so good on my skin. Until my skin broke out in hives, but that's another story (and why I did NOT come back with a tan).

Driving over 2,000 miles is difficult, but the crew I was driving was wonderful. How I love the CTK Norman kids. How I love beach games. How I love reading.

TGIF and Medical Murder Mysteries

Turns out Tate is the second best place to work in Oklahoma. No joke. This has been measured, and we have literally been awarded this title.

Because of this, they gave us the afternoon off.

Of course, I'm still working. This month's schedule looks crazier than last month's. I'm reading a mystery right now (title TBD). It takes place in Hall Park, Oklahoma. That's right, written by two gentlemen who go to Norman's own Wildwood Community Church, and I have the pleasure of reading their work. It's quite good.

The thing I am most impressed with is characterization. Their characters are real from the moment you start reading. Original action. Original description. I'm helping some with logical flow of dialogue, but man oh man, this is good stuff. Very exciting and fast paced. Good work, gentlemen.

I can't wait to find out whodunit.

At Month's End

Listening to: "Sonata for keyboard in D minor, K. 434 (L. 343): P.498"
(Bach Station)

Hot.

So...

I finished all of my work for the month about thirty minutes ago. The only thing I didn't do was check for commonly misused words in one of my manuscripts. I didn't do this because as I was composing an email to the author, I accidentally sent it, which meant she expected the manuscript to follow shortly. So I went ahead and just sent it, along with a complete email.

Work accomplished this month: 10 new books (359,879 words), 8 cleanups (old books moving toward layout), 10 ready for layouts (completed, filed, and moving on!)

I dare say that's pretty good work.

I am starting on a book for next month as soon as I finish this post. The authors...men from the church I used to attend in Norman. Crazy. I don't know them well; however, we did meet when they came to visit Tate. Their book (co-authored in case you didn't figure that out) is a mystery, which I'm thrilled about, as I love mysteries. So I should get started. But first...

A team of us editors ran in the OKC Marathon Relay last Sunday, and we were awesome. Granted we came in AFTER teams with names like "Eating Your Dust" and "Not Gonna Make It," but we DID finish, and as previously stated, we were awesome. Just check out Ben's get up and try to tell me we weren't.


I'm trying to get Collin excited about the "rock 'n' roll" half marathon in San Antonio in November. I think I'm really into this running thing. (Thanks be to Julie and her willingness to share her Runner magazines with me!)

Germany and Japan

Listening to: Rhapsodies (2) for piano, Op. 79: II. Rhapsody in G Minor, Op. 79, Johannes Brahms. (Good for a rainy day.)


I've recently found that I can create composer stations on pandora.com, so I'm trying out new dudes: started with Beethoven, then Bach, then Brahms, and most recently Rachmaninoff (or Rachmaninov...which is it?!). I've never listened intently to classical music (thought about what I was listening to). I've never studied it. I still don't know much, but I think I'm picking up on simple things. The only bad thing is pandora doesn't play ONLY the composer chosen to represent the station. Still, I'm getting the general sound out of each artist, which I like. And it's great background music for the day.

I've just started my final book for the month. "I'll Never Forget You." This is the story of a young GI and a Japanese model. Love is in the air, people. I don't often read romances written by men. I'll try to remember to update.

I had my montly conceptual discussions with senior editor CW yesterday. I believe I redeemed last month's poor conceptual discussions wherein he was using me as an example of "good" conceptual discussions, and I bombed.

CDs are when I talk to CW about the books I've been editing that month. I usually try to bring two or three big ideas that I'm presenting to each writer to the table and talk about how I hope to help the author maket his or her book better. I was able to dig a little deeper with a few of my books this month, so it went well. I got to talk about dialogue structure and conflict and story arc, etc. I like talking about these things (not just redundancy and punctuation, and blah blah blah). It's easy to go into conceptuals and have critcisms, but what I think he's looking for are solutions to problems. I like being able to bring these to the table, because I have good solutions when I have the time to think about them (I give Collin the credit for teaching me to sit and really think about my work). It's just sometimes difficult when you're dealing with ten books in a really hard month.

This month has been good. I am thankful.

Back to Japan...

Deadlines

Both the end of the month and the beginning of the month are difficult. I have manuscripts going out and manuscripts coming in, and getting everything situated takes a few days. Authors also call incessantly during these times. But that's okay. They usually have good questions that need good answers. I'm finding that work goes home with me at the end of the month and at the beginning of the month. Not so bad since I'm a workaholic. God made six working days and one day for rest. I can live with that, so long as I can work on the six!

I have a deadline of 115 pages tomorrow. I'm about halfway there. I finished a children's book, two juvenile books, and twelve pages of a novel about the Holy Mother today. I thought the Miriam book would be spotless, but it turns out the guy's sentence structure is a bit too fancy for its own good. Like, so fancy it doesn't even make sense fancy. So, we'll work with that.

I should get some rest.

Armageddon

Currently playing on my iTunes: Manifold de Amour, Latin Playboys, Desperado Soundtrack

I am trying to finish a book about the end of days. My deadline looms (Thursday), and I just can't seem to get through it. Not that it's bad (or...). The worst thing about the book is that the author doesn't use close quotations (and sometimes periods).

Note to aspiring authors: Clean up your work. Don't submit basic errors. That is the sign of an unprofessional author.

As far as the storyline, it's going to be the new Left Behind series, or so the author thinks. And I might argue that it could be. Her characterization and description are very good. The story is solid. She sounds like she knows what she's talking about. But did you like the Left Behind series? I didn't. It was a quick read. That was about it.

Back to inserting correct punctuation.

Speed

I can't believe how fast we communicate. It just hit me for some reason. I was checking icanhascheezburger.com (one of my favorite blogs...you'll find it to the right) and came across a picture I thought Courtney would appreciate. So I quickly downloaded the picture to my My Pictures file (on my new work laptop! yay!), opened up gmail and attached the picture to a note and sent it to her. This took me maybe thirty seconds.

When I was a teenager I would have had to wait until I got home for the day to call her and tell her about it. And chances would be she would never be able to see it because she probably wouldn't have the Internet. Or is she did it would take her quite some time to dial up and find the picture.

I know thousands have posed this question. But ARE we TOO in touch? Are we too spoiled. Maybe that's a better question. This is my first laptop. I don't know how I lived without laptop before. That is sad. I now carry two communication devices with me at ALL TIMES.

I guess that's why it is so important to rest Sundays. At least one day a week get away from everything. Get out of touch. Be with those you love. Take a nap. Don't turn on the television. Play your guitar. Read a book. Ahhhhh...it's wonderful just thinking about.

But I AM thoroughly enjoying my new job. Oh, how I am. I sent my first edits out to my children's book authors today. It was very exciting.

And now for that picture I wanted Courtney to see...

There are probably few of you who get this. I wouldn't have gotten it if she hadn't told me about Soylent Green. I'm LOLing just thinking about it.

The Holidays Approach

On a totally unrelated note, I wish I were more humble, especially at work.

Chinos + Sweatpants

One of my students wore sweatpants and Chinos to class today. It was classic.

I think it was Doug who introduced me to the idea of "wearing his sweatpants." For example, when the dog is lying on its back with its legs splayed out, "He's wearing his sweatpants." Or who was it that said, when you decide to wear your sweatpants that's when you've given up on life?

I think there was an episode of friends where Chandler's gf broke up with him, and he went through a post-breakup "sweatpants phase."

I wonder what is going on in my student's life today that he wore sweatpants with Chinos.

Pictures

First off, let me say I have no idea why these pictures turned out blue. I will try to fix this problem, maybe. I realize this blue tint takes away from the luscious look of the cake and the cuteness factor of my kitten. I guess I will just have to deal with this.

So Boyd Street had its 4th birthday last week. This was the cake, and it was awesome.


Any of you who need a cake decorated for an event, call Alyson Stearns-Bell. She is amazing.

Here I am with Emily and John (owners of the mag).

Sweet earrings (if you can see them).

And this is an updated picture of my sweet kitten, Marigold.

Awwwwww ......... (except for that blue haze).

Not too much new. C took his first round of generals. Awesome. I'm working at the mag and nursing a bad mood. Not so awesome. We're going to the intelligent design v. evolution lecture tonight. Should be awesome.

Awesome.

Incriminating stories are my favorite stories.

I'm finally feeling settled into the semester. Ultimately, life is good. Collin takes his generals this month. I am reading some great books. I'm enjoying teaching three classes, and the magazine is running along swimmingly (I think). I can't wait to go to Missouri in Oct. and then Beaver's Bend in Nov. Yippee for fall and trips with friends and family! (although I could do without the weather turning cold)

I didn't sleep well last night and at 12:30 got so frustrated I kicked Collin and woke him up and all but shouted, "Don't wake me up until 7:30. I can't sleep." I also mentioned something about his legs twitching in his sleep, but he knows I wasn't blaming him for keeping me up. What he really knows is that I am quick to lose self control and am very hateful when I can't sleep. So what does he do? He gets up this morning and gets my breakfast stuff ready and puts together my lunch and washes the dishes I didn't get to last night. He says he did this bitterly whilst trying to love me. I say it doesn't matter. I appreciated it, period.

School!

I'm sitting in my new office in Copeland Hall. (Come visit, ya'll!) I like it. There is a nice, big window and a nice, big tree rooted just outside. I walked to the union today thinking I was going to purchase a huge Diet Coke but decided to walk next door and just get a DC out of the vending machine for $1. It's plenty, probably not much less than the huge one I could have bought for well over a dollar.

I never mentioned the rest of my birthday presents. My nice husband set me up with all the jogging gear I need. New shoes (from the in-laws) and a new (first-ever) iPod Shuffle! I love it. It makes jogging so much easier and much more fun. It's tiny and clips onto my shorts. I only have to keep myself from buying a bunch of tunes now. What tune would you buy first? Or, if you're an iTunes junky, what was the first tune you ever bought?

Well, our first issue of the semester came out yesterday and yours truly left a flagrant error on one of the more popular (I think) pages of the mag. I am embarrassed and feeling as if I have failed on a huge level. Oops.

Fall Approaches!

I started reading Harry Potter VII night before last. Collin got the book for me for my birthday, and when we visited Barnes and Noble Saturday, and I wanted to buy the book, he decided he'd better go ahead and give me an early birthday present. I did not complain.

I want my other birthday present now too, please.
Thank you.

I have to admit I didn't love the book at first. There was conflict, sure. I probably should have reread number VI first, sure. But I just didn't love it. I kept going, of course, because that's what you do (most of the time). And now that I'm about 200 pages into the book, I'm definitely into the book. I want to go home right now in fact, snuggle up with my new kitteh, Marigold, and read until my eyes get tired. Then I imagine I'd take a little nap, wake up and read some more.

What makes this new little obsession worse? (I'm still chewing gum, so there's that, too.) I'm really worried I'm going to find out how the book ends before I get there. Worried? Really?

Yes.

Onto other life news.

Summer school is over, and I have three weeks off (after I finish grading, which I will do the moment I hit "Publish Post") before a rather busy semester begins. Collin won't be taking classes, so the next few months should be much less stressful for him (once generals are over), but I've now officially got three jobs. I'm thoroughly excited ... I am a real freelance editor now! ... and at the same time hoping it won't be too difficult.

I know it won't. No use in blogging about worry that isn't really worry. I should get to grading.

Gum G-Gum-Gum ... GUM!

My gum addiction has resurfaced. I have gone through three packs of Orbit Spearmint in the past few days. This is a problem.

Awww

Forgot to post this after Kirsten sent it. Love this picture.

Not a One Piece in Sight

But we'll get to that.

Marigold is getting too big. She is also a very playful kitten--something we're not used to with Bitty slugging around all the time; that cat can sleep longer than any cat in existence; however, I think Marigold is getting her up and playing a little more than usual.

I binged for two days straight last week and am feeling the grossness that accompanies lots of ice cream and chocolate cake. As one of my friends said, maybe I'm making up for lost time (with the chocolate cake ... see previous blog).

I will miss Katie Gaylor. We got to spend some good time over the weekend. Friday at her shindig, yesterday by the pool. The girl can talk, and I love her.

We were wearing one pieces at the Reserve swimming pool. We were the only ones in one pieces. I saw two tankinis and dozens of string bikinis. I actually felt self conscious for being in a one piece. But this sweet girl named Cat (Kat?) came up and got in the water with us. She was one of the two tankini girls (with skirt). She smiled and said, "Dig the one pieces! So, are you guys just really modest?"

I thought it was cute. Come to find out we were all regular churchgoers. It was a good little convo.

Kit Cat

Here are some pics of our newest addition, Marigold Buttercup Barnes.



So cute.



Too cute.



Suffocating from cuteness.

If I didn't already tell you, I found her in a parking lot. We've decided (obviously) to keep her.

Other than the new kitten, life is moving right along. Visted family last weekend in North Carolina, which was fun. We enjoyed the drive ... mostly. I can be a real jerk sometimes when it comes to critiquing driving. Luckily, the Lord kicked me in the butt and on the way home I was much more reasonable. Poor C. He does love me.

We danced up a storm at my cousin's wedding. So much fun. C. got super sunburned and looks like he's been paper mached. We're back to work and enjoying that. This blog isn't too exciting.

Wish I had pics of the trip, but alas my camera's batteries died, and we didn't get to a store to purchase new ones. Ah well. The memories live on in our minds (and I'm journaling the trip ... I never regularly journal, but I do journal our vacations).

Along with all of this incredibly insightful news, one must know I am now a fan of chocolate cake. I never used to choose chocolate cake, crazy as that may seem to some (many?), but starting pretty much with Tim and Taryn's wedding, I now choose chocolate. The richer the better. I love it. It's weird when things like this change.

Bleh + Birthday = Thumbs Up (but still tired)

Sadly, all of my blogging energy is going into writing the Boyd Street blog, which I don't get to be myself in. For example, I just came home from Doug's. A group of us sat around and read a short by Flannery O'Connor. It was very fun. I wish we did this more often. Once Collin and I went to the Negus's for dinner, and we sat around and read a Shakespearean play. It was AWESOME. But instead of writing what was really on my mind, I had to write what I thought a writer for Boyd Street would say.

That's not to say what I said about judging wasn't entirely unfounded. I did wonder tonight who would read quickly and who would read slowly, and who would act out the story and who would read in monotone (ME). Fortunately, fairly quickly, the Holy Spirit kicked me in the butt and said, ditch the pride, Meggo. Enjoy the company of friends. This is AWESOME.

Well, praise Jehovah.

I could write this whole thing about the Holy Spirit ... after the book study last night with the girls. It was good. The chapter we read was good. Maybe I will find the energy to blog about it tomorrow. But first, sleep.

God bless you, friends. I love you all. And if you haven't heard, we're going to the Royal B. Saturday to celebrate C.'s birthday (and Josh S.'s birthday). It should be a grand old time. Do come.

Boyd Street

So I started a blog for Boyd Street Magazine. I'm the only one writing on it right now, because none of my writers have contributed yet. But they will. I hope. It's not really me writing. It's me trying be someone else while still kind of trying to be me. But Boyd Street has this "voice," see, and I'm supposed to keep that voice alive.

If you're interested, you can check it out at boydstreet.blogspot.com.

The Madness

I was talking to my husband last night before we went to bed and as I sometimes do was stretching while we were talking.

My doctor told me to stretch my hamstrings and strengthen my quadriceps some months ago when I found out I have a "bad knee." I tend to heed his command off and on. Right now is a sort-of "on" period.

My husband looked at me and said, "How are you so limber? Are all girls that limber?" He then attempted to do the stretch I was doing and couldn't. He mentioned how tight his legs were.

I sort of went off.

"You need to stretch every day! You need to not have tight legs! You need to stretch right now!"

I do this all too often. It's like a crazy switch gets flipped, and my eyes get wide, and I shout, "You need to do THIS. You need to do THIS."

I'm not saying I like it. I'm just being honest here.

My husband's reaction was laughter. He then proceeded to tell me all of the things I've been telling him he "needs" to do as of late. Some of these things include:

You need to stretch your legs.
You need to squeeze out the sponge.
You need to put the sponge in the fish!
You need to get a hair cut.
You need to stop picking.
And rubbing your eyes.
You need to sleep later.
etc.

I AM A MONSTER!!!!!

I can't believe this is what I do ... and what he hears. I must stop this controlling madness.

I cannot do it on my own.

The End of the Month

We made it through our first real month of having "a budget." I am proud of us. We stayed within our limits in each area, and I think this is going to work. It takes a lot of dedication on my part, since it was kind of my idea and I'm the one who keeps track of numbers, but it's a dedication I'm willing to give if it's going to get our debt paid off sooner than later. And Collin is good at answering my questions when I need them answered. Basically I think there will be two times each month I look at the budget. Once in the beginning, once in the middle. I thank God we don't have much debt and hope this trend will be one we employ the rest of our lives.

I've started reworking a novel I wrote in college. It's the same concept, a similar setting, similar characters ... but totally rethought. I actually LIKE my characters now. I believe in them and in the story in a way I didn't before. I think it is more mature. I've tried to start any number of projects in the past months, and then given up on all of them. Maybe I've been too intimidated. This is something I can work with. Something I know can work because it has before. I guess we'll see how it goes once I reach "the great swampy middle." But I'm excited to be writing again. My goal is to finish this rework in a timely fashion so that I can start work on something else fairly similar ... and start shopping for an agent!

Let's predict the number of rejection letters that await me, shall we? I'll say ... 33.

American Idol and Melinda Doolittle

I don't know how many people who read this blog watch American Idol. I had never watched it before this season, and I watch it now because a girl I stood next to in choir throughout junior high and high school is in the Top 9 (and after tonight's elimination round will hopefully be in the Top 8). Her name is Melinda Doolittle, and I am so proud of her. She is amazing. She was amazing back in the day, and she is even more amazing now. If you haven't been watching the show you should watch it just to see her perform. And if you never thought you would buy into reality TV and actually pick up your phone and VOTE, you should suck down that pride and rethink. Vote for Melinda is what I'm saying!

And now for a shout-out to my friends Sean and Mara from the great state of New Hampshire (Live Free or Die!) ...

These two are having a baby boy here in the next couple of days, if they haven't already, and I say, Congratulations!

Those Drafts

They turned out well, for the most part. I was happy to see long quotes. Most everyone had a "theme," even if some of them weren't the greatest, most interesting themes. Good. I look forward to see what my next class has produced.

My husband and I walked in the rain this morning on the way to class. Amazing how Norman flash-floods. No more than 10 minutes of a downpour and the town is seriously flooded, especially around campus. There are places where you simply can't cross the street without stepping into a foot of water. Thankfully, spring showers are warm or at the very most cool, not freezing. My feet are still damp in my wet, black flats, but they're not frozen.

I've read two books in the past two weeks. One by Jodi Picoult (my recent fave) called The Tenth Circle, one by Stephen King (an old fave) called Lisey's Story. Both are good, though King's took a while for me to get into. He does that. Sometimes you're just not really into his stories until page 200. He's the only author I won't put down right away if I'm bored or confused, because I KNOW I will eventually be interested and it will all make sense. Lisey's Story isn't the best, but it is interesting, if difficult to explain. The reason I mention these books, however, is that they are both set in Maine (no surprise there with King), with Picoult's traveling to Alaska at points. I've often thought of moving up east, but I'm such a wimp with cold weather, I don't know if I would fare very well. And according to what I've read about Alaska in Picoult's book, well, Collin has talked about moving there, and even if he's said it in jest, he's crazy. I couldn't handle the all-day NIGHT and super sub-zero tempies. No sir.

I'm really impatient and want to know where we will end up in a couple of years.

I'm leading Bible study next week for Nicole, and we're going to talk about the woman at the well. This is one of my favorite stories in the Bible. How interesting it popped up on my week.

The Interview

My classes have been assigned a feature story. More specifically, a personality profile on someone in the community whom they think is newsworthy. Each student is to interview his or her subject and two others. Each student is to find the "unique whatness" of his or her subject--what makes the subject interesting. Each student is to figure out a theme, or common thread that will weave his or her story together. Students struggle with this concept of theme.

A theme can't be cliche, or shouldn't be. But you can't just write the subject's history or resume. It can't be a chronological story (well, most often it can't). So, for example, one of my students is writing a personality profile on the woman who runs(?) the Big Brothers Big Sisters program here in Norman. My student wants to write a lot about this woman's job, but she can't just report on BBBS. This is a human interest story. So she thought about it and came up with the idea of a matchmaker, except this woman isn't a matchmaker in the sense we first think of (Fiddler on the Roof). She is a different sort of matchmaker. I liked it. I thought it was a good theme for a student writing her first feature story/personality profile.

So today was the first day back for my students after spring break '07. (Spring Break, baby, yeah!) I knew they wouldn't be prepared, wouldn't have completed their interviews, wouldn't really be ready to start thinking about theme and their story leads and nut graphs or to start outlining their stories. So, I tried something new.

I didn't want to just talk at them about how a feature story differs from a basic news story. I've done that before. They don't listen. They needed something more tangible to work with. I went out on a limb and let them interview me. They walked into class. I asked them, "With a show of hands, how many of you have honestly started interviewing for this assignment?" (for which the complete rough draft is due in two days). A few raised their hands. OK. Then, "Take out a sheet of paper. Imagine you're interviewing me for this assignment. You're writing a personality profile on me. You have to find out my 'unique whatness.' Take a few minutes and write down some questions you'd like to ask me."

Now, I talked about this with my husband last night. My students don't need to know me on a deeply personal level. Honestly, I don't really know why. I mean, does their knowing me a little bit personally keep me from teaching them? I don't think so. I also don't think it would keep them from taking me seriously. I can still grade someone unbiasedly if they know me a little bit. I can still help him or her become a better writer (I hope). It's when teachers start getting to know their students and hanging out with them outside of class that is crossing the line, right? I don't do that. But still ... I told my students I reserved the right to make some of the answers up. I couldn't do it. They asked me quetsions that I couldn't make up answers to. So I answered them. But it was a short interview. (And it was interesting how one class pursued a much more personal line of questioning than the other. And the class that didn't--that basically just asked me about work and my caffeine addiction--came up with the better themes.)

This was my goal: students need to realize they can't go out and do a bunch of interviews for a feature story and write/complete the story that night, because what will happen is, they think they've got what they need; they sit down to write; maybe they even have a theme picked out; but then they realize there are HOLES. There is information they need to go back and find out more about. This is true almost every time.

So I asked, "From the information you just extracted, what kind of themes pop out at you." The class then brainstormed. We talked about holes and going back for more, about timing, about a lot of things. I asked them how they might lead into the story. Leads are so very important. I asked them what kind of stories or ideas would they want to develop in the body of the story that back up the theme they'd like to go with. It was good. This made a good transition into talking about the stories they're actually working on.

So, we talked about their stories. About possible themes. We brainstormed. Then the class worked on their stories. I gave them questions to respond to; they started outlining or drafting. I don't care whether a person thinks it's wrong to let her students interview her; I think the class went swimmingly. Goals were met.

Now we'll just have to see how those drafts turn out Thursday.

I am late for a meeting

I need to blog
I shall blog!
(something more meaningful ... soon)
I can't stop coughing
The joys of sickness
I'm jealous Doug got to go to Disneyworld

It's a Beautiful Day!

Yes. Today is a good day. I'm so proud of Collin for giving a great presentation. I wasn't there, but apparently it went really well (I read the evaluations, and they were so encouraging and funny and honest). He's got this incredible gift for teaching, and I know it, and others know it, but he often is too critical of his work to recognize how smart he is, so hearing him say that his instructor praised his performance today was great. I was so happy for him and could see how happy he was. My husband has the ability to make sense of even the hardest concepts; I'm often amazed at what he's able to explain to me through the use of great, real-life examples. I'll be honest, I don't always love it when he says, "Hey, Meghan. Can I tell you about this study I was reading about?" (He likes to practice his lectures on me sometimes.) And I'll sort of begrudgingly say, "Sure." And I'll walk in there and listen, and it all sounds so crazy, and I think I'll never understand it. And I don't care if I don't. But then he asks me, "Do you see what I'm saying?" And he is so genuine and really wants me to get it, and so I say, "No. Not at all." And he'll sit back and think of a different way to explain it, and his excitement is so affecting, and I'll start to really listen, and I'll get it. And I'm so proud of him. Granted, I might not think of what he taught me again, but so it goes; I'm not a psychologist. I'm just proud of him and excited for him. He's going to be an extraordinary teacher! Already is. And he really cares about that. I am so very excited about our future. I wonder where we'll move?

Random aside: I love publishing.

I like this song (but don't really get the lyrics).

I think the song could be even bigger if someone redid it today (not that it's an old song, nor too small). I am thinking about this song because of a King of the Hill episode I just watched. Well, I'd seen the episode before, so I wasn't really watching it. I was really grading papers. I am going through a King of the Hill phase that just won't end. I have three seasons on DVD. It's all I ever watch. EVER.

The song is Life in a Northern Town (heya mamama, heya a myeeya, heya mamama, heeeeeeeya ... Life in a Northern Town). The first verse is about the Salvation Army band playing while children drink lemonade, and the morning lasted all day. All day. Yeah, not so much. But it's a great little feel-good song that reminds me of my youth.

Collin and I went to Bison Witches yesterday for a beverage (and a break from work). It was definitely a break from the current norm, which is, Collin works all day, takes a quick break for dinner and then works some more, then goes to bed. I understand because I was once in grad school. This particular semester is really full for him, so it was nice yesterday that he took a break from the norm. I know he wanted to go work out, but I guess that's part of what marriage is all about ... putting another's desires before your own. I would love it if this were really natural for me.

Back to Life in a Northern Town ... is that song about a young man going to war?

Back to school: I've gotten a lot of grading done in the past 48 hours. This is good.

I WANT TO GO TO THE BEACH!!!

Need More Coffee

I find myself more angry this semester when students aren't prepared. The thing that's crazy is that they have attitude with me when they're not prepared. I guess I've dealt with this for years, but sometimes I get more of it, and that's what it feels like right now. Maybe my patience has just run thin. As Mr. Strickland's wife, Miz Liz, would say, "My purse of forgiveness is empty." I guess my "purse of forgiveness" should never be entirely empty. And really it's not. I do care for these kids. But sometimes .... man oh man.

Yes, Why All the Editing?

At least one of you has asked why my blogs seem to disappear. The thing is, a few days ago I received an email concerned about my blogging, or, the pouring out of my soul. The concerns weren't without warrant. There is a lot of hype about employers looking at blogs, online predators, you know the story. This is all fair. But the thing is, I have this tendency to want everyone's approval, so when I read the email I immediately wanted to throw up and was pretty much depressed the rest of the day. Me being me, I directly logged onto Blogger and edited all of my non-picture blogs to "save draft."

Collin said he wasn't surprised I did that.

Today I worked on the mag (after taking care of the boys for a couple of hours this morning; I tell you I love them more and more every week). I got a lot of work done but wasn't able to mark off many pages as "done" because there's so much little work to do here and there. The mag that comes out tomorrow should be good. I'm happy about it. I think my "letters" harken back to the old days, when I was witty. I think I got bored by the end of last semester and just wasn't as "on." Well, friends, I'm on again. For now.